Yet Another Blog…why?

Here is what you don’t need to know about me in order to understand or appreciate this blog, but likely want to know, any way: I am in my early 40s and am happily single and child-free. I am an educator and traveler. I am a writer and a thinker. I am a former Christian, an active Nichiren Buddhist and a passive atheist (with an agnostic-leaning perspective). I am Black. I love food; it is my true religion. Above all, I am a global citizen. I am originally from the United States of America, having grown up in New Orleans and lived the majority of my adult life in New York City. I lived in Rwanda in East Africa for two years and traveled to countless countries within Africa and beyond.  I currently live in Shanghai, China.

Here is what you definitely need to know to fully appreciate this blog and understand the context from which many, if not all, my posts originate: I do not understand and am often insulted by the portrayal of the “single woman” in 21st century popular culture. The 21st century single woman seems to stubbornly live on either side of a narrow continuum. Either she is secretly miserable, merely tolerating her solitude until she is cured from this illness of non-marriage by a nice man who is willing to put a ring on it and a fetus in it OR she is a 30something teenager whose expendable income is spent on a litany of superficial luxuries and for whom the next toe-curling orgasm is akin to winning the ring from the brother with the advanced degree and six figure salary.

One of my favorite writers, Junot Diaz, has said: “We have a hard time seeing women as full humans, which results in the world at large diminishing their humanity.”

It is from this Diaz insight that I chronicle my journey as a fully realized human being who honors the women who see themselves as MORE than potential mothers and wives-in-waiting. Women who nurture, love and live in many different neighborhoods, refusing to restrain their existence to the ghettos that the world still builds around them almost a quarter of the way into the 21st century.

8 Responses

  1. Go ‘head, sistafire! I just returned from Turkey after six months there, and I can’t wait to go back. But, as I was sitting in my car, worrying about money and contemplating putting off the return trip to “when i get some money,” a friend mentioned your blog on Facebook.
    So, I say again, go ‘head sistafire! I can’t wait to be inspired by your adventures.
    -signed Fellow Traveler

    • From one traveller to another: I wish you adventurous experiences filled with awkward situations, engaging, yet language-challenged conversations and an endless amount of food that you have never eaten before and can’t wait to eat again!

  2. Now this is the “Eat, Pray, Love that i can relate to! Keep the stories coming! Signed ~ a woman of a certain age who is inspired by your free spirit……

  3. You could definitely see your skills in the work you write.
    The world hopes for even more passionate writers such as you who are not afraid to say how they believe.
    At all times follow your heart.

  4. Love this! Love your voice!

  5. Hi Keturab, I was inspired by your yourtube and blog posting. I am a newly retire educator and I wish I could do half of what you have done in you short life. I always wanted to retire and travel with my husband. However, divorce put an end to that dream. Now I wish I had the nerves to travel as a single older women, but fear and lack of know how stops me once again. Keep doing what you are doing and helping other women know it is Ok to go it alone and still free loved.

    • Hi Rose. (I assume the video you saw me in was the “International Wives of African Men” series??) Anywho…I am humbled to know I have inspired you. I urge you not to believe the fallacy that your age, your relationship status (and how it has changed and will continue to change over the years) and any other thing is a predictor of success in any avenue you choose to take in your life. If you spent decades as an educator, you know how to plan, Lady. If you go into an international life or a life of just more travel, you have the know how to get the know how you need to actually do it! Good luck to you!

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